The only thing consistent is change.

As the days lessen before I go the more stress I feel. It's a complicated stress though and the second I get in my car to drive away on Saturday it will dissipate.
I tattooed today for 8 hours straight, 3 different people. I noticed that as I tattoo all I think about is the work that is being produced.
I worked out when I was done and that was when my mind started to race. Everything I have been stressing about surfaced. Once it surfaced I started to process and problem solve.
Part of me is stressed about my Seattle friends (about an hour away). They seem to never drive down to Tacoma and the only time I see them is if I go to them. Not only that but the times we've scheduled to hang in Tacoma they call the day of cancelling. I feel slightly selfish but at the same time I'm really upset about it and have been upset about it. The big deal is that I don't have time this week to drive to them. It has nothing to do with wanting to see them. I just don't think I will because I'm not making the effort. Then I end up feeling guilty. I can't seem to find the root of that in me.... why I would feel guilty for other's stuff?
Secondly I have murals to still paint, tattoos to do, a room to pack, some important errands, and my party to be had. AND people who need me to change my whole schedule and drive forever to see them and if I don't it's my fault.
Sheesh.. I know I sound horrible. And it won't even matter in a week. But it's been buggin me for months now.
I think I'll be ok though and be able to get stuff done. I just have to be wise with my time.
One of my clients cancelled 2x in a row and now I have to tattoo him monday and I really didn't want to tattoo anyone after tomorrow.

I'm so excited to leave but I have started to feel all the shtuff that comes along with change. The feelings to be exact. I'm so sad to leave the people I love here. Today Jared said "Chelsea you just need all of your 'good' friends to move with you." That's how I feel in a lot of ways. My good friends up here are married and kids are coming into the picture, or already have been. I must say it changes things. I really don't have a lot of friends that aren't married up here. I thought about this a lot today. It didn't make me sad or anything it just gave me some insight to some stuff I was dealing with concerning my social life and my life here in general.
This week will go by fast. Not only do I have a ton going on but I also just think I have a lot going on inside that only time can process and heal and figure out.
Time and God is where trust for healing and change can be.